Getting Married Again…

Written by Anne Driscoll for Paradise Springs

It’s no secret that men and women are getting married more than once nowadays. However, with the decision to wed a second or third time there are also the common worries about tradition and proper etiquette.

Brides who are walking down the aisle for at least the second time tend to be more mature and ready to take on the world in a more sophisticated manner, oftentimes they are full-fledged career women who barely even have time to fit a wedding into their schedule. With commitments such as work, children and a personal life, it can be a tricky balancing act to plan a wedding during the prime of your life.

Couples who are getting married again usually reflect more on the actual ceremony, while at the same time trying to juggle everything in between. Because of the many activities involved, it is often a good choice to hire a wedding consultant. Many wedding consultants specialize in planning signature weddings for second time brides and keep the bride and groom on schedule. In the case of a schedule this often means someone else remembering to get the wedding dress altered before the wedding picture is taken or remembering the ring bearer’s pillow is not available until the day before the ceremony.

What About the Children?
Wedding consultants are good for helping to coordinate extended families including the bride or groom’s children. Many couples nowadays are choosing to have their children be part of the ceremony. For example, sons might play the part of an usher or even a ring bearer. Depending on the age of the children, the daughter can also take part in the ceremony as a flower girl or even a bride’s maid. The bride’s son or daughter might stand next to the bride in a show that the groom is not only marrying the mother, but also acknowledging he is taking the child as his own. This can be done visa versa as well and it is not uncommon to have a son or daughter walk down the aisle with their mother. Since children will often have some issues with their parent getting remarried, it is a good idea to let them have a big part in the wedding so they can feel a sense of importance. Singing during the ceremony, lighting a unity candle or just incorporating a reading will also tie the family and the ceremony together in a special way.

Choosing the Right Dress and Style For You and the Wedding Party
Blusher’s are not a good choice for brides walking down the aisle a second time since this reflects the innocence of a first time bride. Additionally, most brides the second time around do not choose the princess dress they would have chosen to wear in their first wedding. However, white dresses are no longer taboo. The most important thing is to pick a dress, regardless of the color, that brings out the beauty of the bride. Hemlines are shorter and the colors are often soft and pastel. Overall, dresses tend to be less ornamental with better quality silk or silk satin and the train is not as long. Another trend for a second time bride is a hairstyle donning fresh flowers, a choice that is very trendy and elegant nowadays.

Wedding parties tend to be pared down from four plus attendants to two close friends or family. Additionally, attendants are usually allowed to pick their favorite cocktail dress that is within the brides color scheme or theme.

Wedding Trends and Who Pays
Smaller, intimate weddings are definitely the norm for second time couples walking down the aisle. The receptions are different too, simple dinner parties or cocktail receptions are preferred over full-blown affairs. Often the bouquet and garter toss are absent instead having these items be awarded to the longest married couple in the room.
Since most of the time the bride and groom will pay for the second wedding, the choices they make are their own this time around. However, if it is a first wedding for the bride or groom, parents might still get involved to pay for a part of the wedding. There are no rules in regards to how to handle this situation, often everyone helps with the budget to make it the most special day possible.

The wedding invitations are issued from the bride and groom, in third person, without titles if it is a second time wedding. It would read as follows:
Jane Cook and John Smith request the honor of your presence at their marriage.

Putting these special touches on a second wedding assures the importance of the commitment. Enlisting the aid of family, friends and wedding professionals ensure an easy and enjoyable day where nerves stay relatively unfrazzled and the sophistication of the event is remembered for years to come.

Finally, remember that while you might have been married before it was not to each other. Treat your special day as just that, and keep in mind it is the first day the two of you will spend your life together.

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